cursedsoul: (Default)
Angel ([personal profile] cursedsoul) wrote2010-10-08 01:59 pm

Application; [livejournal.com profile] polychromatic

[nick / name]: bluemoon
[personal LJ name]: [livejournal.com profile] emeralddarkness
[other characters currently played]: n/a
[e-mail]: blue.crystalwings at gmail dot com
[AIM / messenger]: ceruleangarnet

[series]: Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel the Series
[character]: Liam Angelus Angel
[character history / background]:
The world of Buffy the Vampire Slayer is pretty much the real world, now with 90% more monsters. There are things that go bump in the night, and there are ones that fight them. Angel has been both. He is infamous in Buffy's world, both as a hideously cruel vampire and, incongruously, as a hero and a do-gooder. There's a explanation for all of this, but it takes time. The explanation is a soul.

Angel has 3 names that he's gone by over the years. Liam, his birth name, and then Angelus and Angel, the two names he's chosen for himself. The rule in the fandom is to refer to him as as Angelus when he doesn't have a soul and as Angel when he does. This is not canon the first time he loses his soul, but in almost all the cases thereafter he's called Angelus when soulless, and "Angelus" will introduce himself as such, and correct people who call him Angel. In any case, it seems like the simplest method to differentiate, so I'm stickin to it.

Liam was born in 1727 in Galway, Ireland, and began his life as a normal human. His family consisted of an overbearing father, who was a linen and silk merchant by trade, an unnamed mother, and a younger sister named Kathy -- probably short for Kathleen. He and his parents did not get along in the least. His relationship with his mother is very little known, but part of his attitude towards his father, and the trouble therein, can be probably explained by relatively recent (for that time) changes in the world.

It was around 1750 that things like the Industrial Revolution (which Ireland was mostly left out of) and a whole series of Irish famines started, but neither of these would have affected Liam's family all that much. More to the point were a few other things. For example: the settings for the linen trade were relatively good in that part of the world, but the linen trade itself was suffering. The cotton industry was just taking off and far surpassing both linen and silk. When this is combined with recent anti-Catholic legislation passed by England, in a determined effort to bring Ireland under an English government and to English Culture, it would have been increasingly difficult for his father to earn a living. In 1728, when Liam would have been one year old, the richer part of the majority of the Irish Population, who were largely Roman-Catholic and probably included his family, were disenfranchised in favor of members of the much smaller Church of Ireland. The world that his father had built up and lived in appeared to be failing, and Liam wanted no part of it. He also thought very poorly of England, as did a number of his fellow countrymen at the time. His father, being a merchant, would likely have regularly traded and such with them. Frequent dealings with and positive relationships with Englishmen could have made Liam see his father as a coward, further straining their relationship.

At the age of 18, he got into a relationship with a noblewoman named Sarah Gilfred. Some time, perhaps during these few years but most likely during his time with Sarah or shortly thereafter, Liam became disillusioned with the women of his era as well, particularly the noblewomen. He found them to be "dull, simpering morons" and wished for someone "exciting" and "interesting". Perhaps it was this desire for excitement that further spurred his downfall. By his mid-20s, he appears to have become a hardcore hedonist, and to have developed a taste for alcohol, tavern brawls, whoring and sloth. The only member of his family for which he seemed to hold any real affection was Kathy, and his only real ambition seemed to be seeing the world. Then, in 1753, everything changed.

In 1753, at age 26, Liam's father labeled him a "terrible disappointment" and kicked him out of the house, after a night of drunken debauchery and attempts to seduce the family's maidservent. Liam found his way to the pub shortly after, and during a tavern brawl, managed to catch the eye of the vampire Darla, dressed as a noblewoman or heiress. After being kicked out of the tavern, she lured him into an alley, where he hit on her and she promised him a world of excitement and travel. Shortly thereafter, she sired and killed him. One funeral later and Liam rose again from the grave, astonished and pleased at the new sensation of clarity and power, and the taste of evil. He wanted more, and he got it -- in a remarkably short time, he became one of the cruelest and the most flamboyantly sadistic vampire ever recorded.

He didn't waste time. Pretty much his first act was to slaughter everyone in the entire community where he had lived. His first victims were his own family, after an invitation from his sister allowed him back into the house. Kathy had been happy when she saw her brother, as she thought that he'd returned to her as an angel, thus fulfilling a promise that he'd made upon being kicked out of the house -- he told her that they'd see each other again. Still, Liam was gone by then, and a demon had taken his place. He murdered her, and then his parents. Afterwards he took the name Angelus in place of his given name, almost certainly because of his sister's little mistake. So he was known for over a hundred years.

After leaving Ireland, Angelus and Darla cut a bloody path through Wales and northern England before finally getting to London, in 1760. It was here that he met Darla's sire, The Master, the oldest of vampires and one of the most powerful. The Master was impressed by Angelus's viciousness, though during their first meeting Angelus openly mocked him, showing no fear of his greater age, power, and authority. In fact, he impressed Darla so much by doing so that she decided to stick with him and travel the world rather than hang with the Master. So, until 1898, Darla and Angelus swept across Europe. Various atrocities were committed during this period, and Angelus became known as several different things, including "the scourge of Europe", "the one with the angelic face", and "the demon with the face of an angel".

I could go on at great length about just some of the cruelties that Angelus committed, because I certainly don't know all of them. However, it would get a bit redundant, as few of the things he did have much relevance in his overall history other than "and then for about 150 years he was a Very Bad Man". There are a few acts that do have some relevance, and which merit diving a bit further into. One of those things is, in 1764 he and Darla tracked down the family of Daniel Holtz, a famed vampire hunter. They raped and murdered his wife and killed his infant son, then sired his daughter and left her, forcing Holtz himself to kill her. This sent Holtz on a roaring rampage of revenge, and for the next nine years, he tracked Angelus and Darla across most of Europe, hell bent on their destruction. He ultimately failed, but nearly succeeded a great many times, and was good enough that after a while Angelus, at least, got a bit twitchy where he was concerned. It's possible that this experience taught Angelus a bit of caution, as afterwards he seems a bit less inclined to go provoking the people in power, and scolds Spike for doing so.

He and Darla sired a few vampires, at least some of whom traveled with them for a little while. The next big event is in 1860. This was the year when he met a lovely young girl in London -- sweet, chaste, pure, loving family, lovely life... and the abilities of a seer. Her name was Drusilla, and she feared her gift -- she had visions, usually revolving around pain, suffering, death, and other general misery. Her mother had told her that what she saw was "an affront to the Lord". Angelus took a special interest in Drusilla. He stalked her, killed her family and subjected her to every mental torture he could devise until she went quite insane. Finally, when she was mad and mostly everything that had been in her life or that she'd ever touched had been reduced to blood, he decided that she was his masterpiece and changed her, as an everlasting testament to his cruelty and so that she'd never really be free. Shortly thereafter, Drusilla found a poet named William and changed him. William became known as Spike, for a habit of torturing his victims with railroad spikes. The four stuck together, and Angelus, Darla, Drusilla and Spike plagued Europe. Spike came to greatly admire Angelus, though Angelus followed form and was a bastard, and did things like have sex with Dru when he realized that Spike loved her, just to hurt him.

Anyway, they raised merry hell and had good times with the torture etc. Angelus or Darla appears to be the one to have nicknamed their little band the Whirlwind, and they were perhaps the most brutal and dangerous group of vampires in recorded history, with Angelus as the most evil of the foursome, Spike as the most violent, Darla as the most seductive, and Drusilla as the unpredictable and insane, and with the abilities of a clairvoyant to occasionally guide them. They stuck together for no purpose except to commit as many acts of destruction, horror, and bloodshed as they could devise, and had a great time in doing so. The trouble, for Angelus in any case, came in 1898.

In this year, Angelus raped and murdered the favorite daughter of the Kalderash clan of Romani in Borsa, Romania, having his way with her presumably all night as Darla watched, before finishing her off. To get even, the Kalderash cursed him with the restoration of his human soul. Basically, the effect of the curse went like this: guilt guilt guilt anguish pain guilt what have I done all these people I've killed and lives I've ruined guilt brood guilt etc. Only forever, what with Angelus being immortal and all. Restoring his soul gave him back a conscience, and that combined with a photographic memory of everything he'd done for going on 150 years made it a particularly effective punishment. Darla, disgusted and outraged at what he'd become, chased him off at stakepoint, then took Spike and Dru and headed off for China. "Angelus" tracked them, until they all met during the Boxer Rebellion. He convinced Darla to take him on again, to give him a second chance -- being a monster was all he knew how to be, he wanted to be one still, he didn't want the guilt and anguish. Unfortunately for him, the guilt was his to keep. Despite promising that all could be as before, he could only bring himself to kill animals, murderers, rapists, thieves, and other scoundrels. Darla didn't really care for the new softer side of Angelus, and finally the two of them got into a nasty fight. She wanted him to eat a baby to prove himself, he refused and instead rescued the child.

Thus endth the time of the fabulous fanged four. "Angelus" ran away, and shortly thereafter the terrific trio split up when Darla peeled away to pursue her own interests and go back to the Master, leaving only the dynamic duo of Drusilla and Spike. They went off and did their own thing. The Whirlwind was no more.

Several years later, in 1902, the hero of our story managed to make his way from guilting in Europe all the way across the ocean, to continue his guilting in America. For years he'd been living in self-imposed isolation, perhaps to help control the temptation of feeding on humans altogether. Perhaps he thought this would be easier in NYC, perhaps he wanted a change of scenery, perhaps he just wanted to get away from all them European vampires. One way or another, he spent the next 100 years wandering across America.

Once again, there's a vague period that I could go into more detail in, but that would get pretty dull. Mostly it boils down to "and then Angel traveled the states, and in the process decided that actually humans really kinda suck, also he had several adventures". The next big event happens in the 1970s, a period during which Angel made some highly unfortunate fashion choices and had wandered his way all across America and back to New York. While there, he witnessed a robbery at a doughnut shop. The clerk was shot, and Angel stayed with the man when he died -- then, unable to resist the sight and smell of his fresh, warm, human blood, gave in and drained the body.

As a result of this slight indiscretion, Angel forsook any comforts he might have had and adopted the glamorous career of vampirehobo, disgusted with himself. For 20ish years he spent his time skulking in alleys, avoiding daylight and people and living mostly or possibly exclusively off the blood of any rats that he happened to catch in said alleys. It was a dark and unhygienic time in his life, but luckily it passed. One day in 1996, while skulking in an alley and trying to catch another of those wiley rats, he met a good demon named Whistler -- or, more accurately, Whistler managed to track him down. Whistler convinced our vampirehobo that there was something better he could do with his time than dumpster dive, and then packed him all the way across the country, probably in the cargo hold of some plane or perhaps in on a marathon road trip, with lots of skulking in the car with the blacked out windows. Anyway, no matter how he did it, he managed to get Angel to LA and then managed to get him in position to stalk I mean watch this 15 year old valley girl, Buffy Summers. He continued to watch her for at least several days, at school, in the graveyard, at her home through her window in this totally non sociopathic creepy stalker way I swear no really. Finally, after a while of following her around, he decided that he wanted to help her, and do something with his life rather than continue to starve in alleys in winter amid the dirty snow. So, filled with a new purpose, he got cleaned up, transformed into a gorgeous non-hobo, and moved to Sunnydale to wait for Buffy. He met her the next year, when she finally moved there, and introduced himself as Angel, and quickly fell in love. He set himself up in the business of protecting her, which mostly for the first season involved showing up at the local nightclub, lurking for a while, delivering a cryptic warning of unspeakable danger, and then vanishing until the end of the episode, where he'd turn up to lurk in the shadows and watch the post-apocalyptic celebration party of Buffy and her friends.

Things began to change when Buffy began to fall in love with him as well. They really changed when she discovered he was a vampire. Still, he was a vampire with a soul, not really one of the bloodsucking demons of the night that she'd been called to fight, so they worked things out. They dated. Angel even began to think that actually, it was possible that his life might not suck for every single second of every single day for the rest of eternity. Then, on Buffy's 17th birthday, the two of them finally fell into bed together, and everything changed.

Back when the gypsies had cursed him, there was an escape clause on the curse. It had been designed to make him miserable for eternity, so therefore: be happy, lose the soul. If Angel were to ever achieve a moment of real happiness, even a second of it, his soul would be freed and Angelus would once again be unleashed on an unsuspecting world. Well, that's just what happened. Sex with Buffy gave Angel a few seconds of happiness, and so Angel became Angelus, who made it his personal mission to make Buffy's life a living hell.

Angel had fallen in love with Buffy, and Angelus is Angel, simply skewed. His love was perverted into a single-minded obsession that manifested itself in torturing and killing her friends, spreading as much grief and misery as he could contrive how, and stalking Buffy as the creepiest creeper who has ever creeped. He didn't seem to want to kill her, but my, he certainly wanted her to suffer. Meanwhile, he got back together with Spike and Drusilla, who were in the neighborhood. This meant the gang was as united as it was going to be (roughly a year back, Angel had staked Darla himself), and the three lost no time in teaming up again to bring murder, mayhem, etc. Angelus also apparently got right back to screwing Drusilla, mostly to be a bastard and make Spike squirm. Needless to say, Spike really didn't appreciate Angelus hanging out putting the moves on his girlfriend as he was temporarily incapacitated and in a wheelchair. So, when Angelus decided that for his next trick he was going to suck the world into Hell, Spike decided that enough was enough.

Spike liked the world a bit too well to watch it dragged through to Hell, and besides, he wanted Drusilla (who'd been responding a bit too much to Angelus) back for himself. He therefore found Buffy and convinced her to let the two of them team up to stop the world from ending. Buffy agreed, and so for the Final Boss battle of the season, Spike helped out a bit then knocked Dru out and hit the road. Meanwhile, Buffy and Angelus had a duel to the death. It was a close fight, but quite apart from the fact that Buffy is stronger than Angel or Angelus, she also seemed to be the only one really willing to kill her former lover. She had the advantage and was about to end it when something completely unexpected happened.

Angelus was, once again, cursed with his soul. Unfortunately, it was juuuuust a little too late -- Angelus had already opened the portal that was going to suck the world into Hell, and his blood was the only thing that could reseal it. Buffy kissed Angel goodbye, told him she loved him, and then saved the world. She stabbed him through the chest with the fancy world-saving sword, and he was sucked into Hell to be tormented for the rest of eternity, courtesy of his newly returned soul.

Fast forward five months or so.

There's a funny thing about TV death. Usually it's not half so permanent as the kind of death that most of us are used to, the kind where you stay dead. Such is the case here, though Angel hadn't technically died (again). Still, the eternity of torment in Hell wasn't quite up to the normal standards for an eternity. It lasted a good long while, but not forever.

The Hell to which Angel had been sent was a different dimension, wherein time ran differently. Several hundred to several thousand years of torment after he'd been dragged down to Hell (or four to five months later in Sunnydale time) Angel was spat back out into the normal world, naked as the day he was born. He was feral and insane, animalistic and broken because of the tortures he'd been subjected to for hundreds of years -- though oddly, he retained enough human intelligence to go for a pair of pants right off the bat. Maybe that can be counted as the sign of hope. In any case, he found a pair of pants posthaste and escaped into the forest, where he presumably spent the time eating deer or something, until he was found again by Buffy. She was shocked, he attacked her, she attacked him, and she knocked him out and dragged him back to the mansion he'd been staying at while he was soulless. She grabbed her handy dandy shackles and chained him to the wall, and after spent a few episodes trying to figure out if there was any way for her to help him back to sanity as he flinched and cringed when she stepped too close. Finally he managed to break loose from his chains, ran off, and beat and strangled a man to death in order to save Buffy. After this he spoke for the first time in season 3, begging her to help him. She did. The hardest part seemed to be remembering enough to remember her in the first place; after he knew that much he got on like a house on fire. A few episodes were spent far twitchier than normal, but he mastered himself and tried focusing with lots of meditation and martial arts, until he was himself again. Doubtless he was scarred by the experience, but he knew himself again.

Following this ordeal, he and Buffy decided that they couldn't risk dating again, and had to be Just Friends. Hijinks were had during which they tried to uphold this pretense, but neither of them could quite manage it. They were in love, they will always be in love, and Just Friends wasn't a possibility. They'd kiss each other or try to kill each other or make love or anything but be calm where the other was concerned. So they finally gave up and were a couple again. Unfortunately, after a few months of being almost content again, Angel decided that being (somewhat) happy with the love of his life just wasn't something he could do.

He knew perfectly well that Buffy would never have a chance for a normal life with him. He was a vampire, this undead creature of the night, and he couldn't grow old with her or go on picnics on a summer afternoon or even be with her in the more physical sense without going psycho and trying to kill her friends and family -- plus, what if he went evil again without them having sex? So, because he thought Buffy deserved so much more than that and because he loved her too much to leave her alone if she was around, they'd just proved that, he broke up with her and moved to LA. Besides, he had to have been brought back from Hell for some reason.

Once in the City of Angels, he made it his mission to fight the demons, vampires, etc who preyed on the innocent. He did the loner thing for a while, showing up to save the innocent and then sweeping off into the night with his black coat flowing behind him, living underground all alone and subsiding (as usual) off of blood from the butcher and bagged blood that may or may not be human. Then one day, things changed again.

The catalyst for this change was Angel meeting a half demon, who introduced himself as Doyle and pretty much shoved himself into Angel's life, whether he wanted him there or NOT.



losing doyle made him more overprotective

Angel met a half demon named Doyle, who joined forces with him. Doyle sometimes got visions from the Powers That Be, directing him to people that need help or places that trouble was going down. The Powers That Be needed a champion to help the helpless, and Angel ended up with the gig. So, he teamed up with Doyle and a girl named Cordelia Chase, who was also from Sunnydale. Together they set up Angel Investigations, to help the hopeless and spread safety and peace throughout Los Angeles, by fighting the monster of the week, and occasionally running back to Sunnydale when he thought Buffy needed help. A few months after all of this started, he got accidentally changed back into a normal, mortal human. Buffy was in town and she and he promptly broke his table before deciding they'd best move to his bed, along with ice cream. Still, despite being elated about this fact that he could be with Buffy now, he ultimately decided that he couldn't be, because he was needed to fight the good fight. So he undid everything and went back to fighting the forces of evil, albeit even more broodingly than he usually did. One of these weeks Doyle got killed in the process of saving a bunch of innocents, and in the process he passed on the ability to have visions to Cordelia. Soon after this, another of the old gang from Sunnydale showed up. Wesley Wyndam-Pryce was a former watcher who had been in charge of Buffy and of Faith, another slayer who'd gone Bad. He'd been sacked by the Council due to abject failure at his duties, and Angel ended up hiring him. Together, the three of them fight crime and also evil lawyers.

Eventually, Angel found a prophecy that states that once the battles are over and he's done the work that the PTBs need him to do, he'll be changed back to human and allowed to live until he dies. So now he's working for that, and in the mean time being Angel, Good Vampire and Protector of the Innocent. And really trying to avoid that moment of happiness that will send him evil once again.







[character abilities]:
Angel has a great many abilities, starting with 'standard buffyverse vampire, bonus given for age.' WHAT THIS MEANS:
  • He can look human, but he's not. His true face is clearly inhuman, with fangs that include but are not limited to the canines, yellow eyes, and a prominent brow ridge. He can hiss, snarl, growl, and roar like a big cat.
  • He needs mammalian blood for nourishment. He can't die of starvation but can get in a bad way, and though he can eat normal human food it does nothing for him but flavor -- and his taste buds don't work the same way as a humans, so the taste is dull.
  • He hasn't got a reflection, and by the same logic is mostly immune to straight up mind reading.
  • He needs an invitation to enter a dwelling.
  • His weaknesses include garlic, holy water, a physical copy of the bible, and the crucifix. These last three blister and burn when they make contact with his skin; in addition, he has an instinctive dread of the cross. Still, he has a pretty firm control of that dread given a bit of mental prep time. It's just not gone. He'll flinch and cringe when caught by surprise, and can be held at bay with a crucifix if he doesn't see it coming. He can stand the pain of having these objects burn into him, but prefers to avoid it where possible.
  • He can be killed by decapitation, being set on fire, being exposed to direct sunlight (and held there until he's dust), or a wooden object of sufficient mass shoved through his heart -- a splinter wouldn't kill him, a stake would. Bullets, knives, rebar, glass, etc, can hurt like hell (nerve endings still function, and being stabbed will feel like being stabbed) but unless they happen to decapitate him he will heal.
  • Angel heals quickly, even for a vampire, who are healing masters. He appears to be less prone to going up like a candle than some vampires when exposed to fire. With the exception of being stabbed with something wooden, he appears to be relatively hard to seriously injure. He is immune to diseases.
  • Being dead, he has no breath and is thus immune to things like drowning and poison gasses. He can speak and smoke, but cannot give CPR.
  • Stimulants, drugs and poisons affect him; however, as vampires are by nature dead to begin with, most of the more dangerous consequences are removed, like lung cancer from smoking and alcohol poisoning. Human lethal drugs and poisons will not kill him, though may still affect him in other ways. If he feeds off the blood of someone who is high, he becomes high in turn. The same rules probably apply to someone who is drunk.
  • He has substantially enhanced senses, most specifically smell, hearing, and night vision. He can tell apart individual humans and vampires by scent alone, and can taste the presence of drugs or steroids in the blood, as well as being able to tell by taste what kind of blood it is. Unsurprisingly, he is particularly sensitive to the scent of blood.
  • He has highly enhanced physical strength, agility, reflexes and stamina, and they just improve with age. As he's old, the levels of all of the above are high. Physically what he can do varies from episode to episode. He has jumped 100 feet up in a single bound and moved so quickly that he's literally a blur, though presumably there's some reason that he can't do this all the time.
  • His hair, and presumably fingernails, either continue to grow or he has some psychological control over things like the length of his hair. This last answer might be the most reasonable, as he can grow a mustache and how else would he always be so clean-shaven these days without being able to use a mirror?
  • He has a photographic memory
  • He can: Have sex, cry, survive extreme high pressure without problems, sense when someone he sired is physically nearby to an extent, sleep, dream
    He cannot: Reproduce in any way but by 'siring' someone except through plot device, hypnotize people, turn into a bat/wolf/mist, etc.
  • In the non-standard-but-still-vampire-related vein of things, Angel can in theory lose the soul that Angelus was cursed with, which would instantly have him revert to type as sadistic-scary-vampire. Technically the out clause is 'a moment of true happiness' but honestly it seems to have something intrinsic to do with getting laid. My personal theory is that Angel needs to be happy/satisfied/content in every way possible in order to trip the escape clause: physical, emotional, mental, etc, so sex works in a way that, say, the birth of his son or finding the woman he loves is back from the dead just doesn't. Sex with someone he is in love with/loves, regardless of their experience or how good they are at the physical act, has a way of tripping all his happy buttons all at once, which turns him psychotic. Sex with someone else, once again regardless of how good a lay they are... doesn't, and can range from a decent time in bed to perfect despair, or any combination thereof. In either case, he keeps his soul. In addition, Angelus can be brought out by any alternate method of soul removal or extraction. The curse's requirements do not have to be fulfilled, that pesky soul just needs to be drained.

    In addition to all of this, he is a highly skilled combatant, both unarmed (his preferred fighting style) and with a whole variety of weapons, though he prefers the axe and the broadsword. He is also proficient in many forms of martial arts. Because of all that time he's had for reading and learning, he's got an immense and intricately detailed knowledge of both demonology and history, and has some experience in witchcraft and sorcery. He can perform exorcisms and glamours, as well as rituals and other spells. He is a charmer and a pretty darn good detective, when he wants or needs to be. He has equally intricate and detailed knowledge of torture and torture methods, both physical and psychological, and has proven considerably skilled in the manipulations of the emotional states and thoughts of others. He is a highly skilled and extremely convincing improvisational actor, and is very intelligent. He has a flair for leadership, as well as for creating strategies and tactical plans. He's a master of intimidation, and can frequently intimidate others into giving him his way.

    He's got "nice handwriting" and is a gifted sketch artist, who appears to prefer conté crayon, charcoal, china ink, and good 'ol graphite pencil to draw portraits. He is also überpolyglot, and can speak English, Korean, Tibetan, Greek, Latin, Italian, Spanish, French, Russian, Romanian, German and Irish Gaelic (/Gaeilge -- he is best in classic/early modern but has probably kept up enough that he isn't stuck with ye olde Irishe, after all, he IS an Irishman) fluently, and is attempting to learn the language of the Vinji and Sahrvin demons via tape. This may not be the extent of the languages he speaks either -- he spent some time in China, and so may know Chinese, and given his proficiency in all those martial arts, might also be able to speak Japanese, as well as who knows what demon dialects. He is reasonably competent with modern technology, though remains uncomfortable with it and prefers to make other people handle the machines.

    Another thing of note is that there appear to be minor physical variations between Angel and Angelus. Whether he deliberately alters his appearance (likely with the aid of cosmetics) or if having a soul has a visible side effect is unknown, though the second option is the more likely. When Angel does not have a soul, his skin appears paler and his eyes and lashes/lashline slightly darker in an effect that is not unlike eyeliner, though extremely subtle. When he does have a soul, though still pale, his skin color seems more natural, healthier, and more human.

    And he cannot sing.

    [character personality]:
    I recognize that with the whole split personality deal that's possible when Angel lets his soul get out, I'm almost not apping one character, but two. Because of this, I'm addressing the personalities of both Angel and Angelus in this section. Still, it is best to remember two things when dealing with them/him. First, despite the clear and obvious differences between Angel and Angelus, they are in the end the same person, just with and without the morals. The dark impulses of Angelus are always present in Angel, his soul just keeps them from running wild. Angel is, at the end of the day, a layer on top of Angelus, trapping him and changing his actions. Angelus is still there. The second thing that needs to be kept in mind is that Angel is not human. He is not a man, he is a demon with a soul. He is therefore constantly fighting against the things that the demon in him tells him that he wants to do. As a result, Angel tends to the be the more complex character, though they both have their layers.

    According to Darla, "What we once were informs all that we have become." Liam's main personality trait was his hedonism. As Angelus he took that, added an extreme lack of conscience, and ran with it. He's a bastard, and that's the way he likes it.

    Angelus is, first and foremost, evil. He's good at being evil, he enjoys being evil, and shall continue to be evil until hell freezes over. He likes killing babies and nailing puppies to walls and raping nuns and really enjoys torture, both mental and physical. Both torture and murder (slaughter/straight up killing/whatever you want to call it) are, according to him, art form, and should be treated as such. The art of the kill is what separates vampires from common hunters. In Angel's words, he killed to be evil, not merely to eat or for the rush of it or for amusement, though he certainly gleans all of those from a kill. His basic attitude towards life seems to be "it's good to be bad". The worse he can be, the more twisted and sadistic and depraved and maliciously cruel, the more pleased with himself he is. He's a monster, and he really enjoys being one. He is an extreme sadist -- he probably pushes the term about as far as it's possible for it to be pushed. It's part of his still being a pleasure seeker.

    Angelus is extremely self-serving. You could say he's more of a coward than Angel is, but the fact of the matter is that he likes living. Angel just sort of exists, Angelus enjoys it immensely -- as mentioned, he goes out of his way to make sure that he has a good time with his unlife. He is charming and charismatic and makes "friends" easily enough, when he's a mind to. However, his interests begin and end with himself. He easily betrays Darla to save himself, when they traveled together for 150 years, and she was his sire. He's willing to ally himself with others, and have fun with it, but when push really comes to shove, he will look out for number one, at the expense of all others. He takes this concept further even than most of his fellow vampires do. According to a demon who would know these things, Angelus has "no humanity in him." This mostly means that he is the not-so-distilled essence of a complete monster. Unlike Spike, the banner example, but even Darla and Drusilla, who clearly love/are significantly attached to others, Angelus isn't. Now Angel is the exact opposite. He loves others, and generally he cares for your average anyone far beyond himself, simply because he doesn't believe he deserves to live. He is the worst in his company, pretty much without exception, and therefore his life takes lowest priority.

    Angel, for understandable reasons, tries very hard to not be Angelus, occasionally to the point where it seems he subconsciously avoids things simply because the demon in him wants them. Ironically, he can occasionally sabotage himself by doing so. An example are his people skills. Angel is socially awkward, despite Angelus being able to be charming as anything, when he decides to be. Or, perhaps the cause is that Angel wants to be truly honest when he talks to others, and can't be or can't figure out how to be, and can't deal with the adjustment. Angelus, after all, is a natural, master manipulator, and when Angel slips on a role (he is a very fine actor) to manipulate another, he is still very, very good at what he does. Either way, when Angel is trying to be himself he tends to be the stoic, brooding, unable to talk to girls type, until the spotlight is on him and people are expecting him to do something like dance. And be sociable. And talk to people. Then stoic/brooding/taciturn morphs with remarkable speed into a solid impression of a deer caught in the headlights of a semi.

    He knows that his past is his, no matter how much he might regret everything he's done. That being the case, he figures he's probably damned no matter what he manages to do before he gets dusted. He tries very hard to atone, but a near certain knowledge that he'll never be able to makes him a very dangerous force. If he feels it to be necessary, he has essentially nothing to lose and so there is nothing to stop him from becoming as vicious as Angelus. Angel doesn't enjoy torture like Angelus does (or not really -- he loves and hates it, and hates himself for the love, though you really can't be as good at it as he is without enjoying it), but that doesn't mean he won't torture someone when he feels the situation demands it, if there really are no other options. Given this attitude, it's probably understandable that he doesn't appear to care at all about the moral ramifications of beating the crap out of someone who is being less than cooperative (or in rarer cases, Riley Spike anyone Buffy is seeing even someone he doesn't like), or even making fairly casual death threats and/or threats of torture and/or threats of really, really through beatings, be they spoken or implied. Though he is not overly fond of the demon inside him, he'll use it just as easily to do what needs doing. If someone knows of supernatural things, well, a mouth full of fangs is far more intimidating then just another guy off the street, and talking to someone who's killed hundreds and might kill you is more likely to get cooperation from thugs than a reformed killer now with a soul. He'll use Angelus's name and his reputation when he needs to. If he's dealing with someone who knows about his history and needs that person to be intimidated into cooperation, he'll introduce himself as Angelus. When he is pushed hard enough, Angel can be seriously frightening. It can be hard to tell that he's got a soul.

    He is a good snap judge of character, and is really, really good at getting into the heads of other people. Angelus, naturally, uses this to manipulate, torture extremely effectively, and otherwise make people Unhappy. Angel simply uses his skill as a judge of who he can trust and who he doesn't want to waste time on. He can be harsh, unforgiving, and demanding with people who claim to have changed and want to switch their hat color from black to white, but he will always be willing to help them on the rough road from bad to good, if they want helping. After all, he's been there and done that. He knows how hard it is. This being the case, if someone convinces him that they've gone good, he'll fight anyone and anything he needs to in order to make sure they retain the freedom to come closer to the light. Angelus, on the other hand, does not routinely have the patience for that sort of thing, and certainly doesn't go around recruiting for the forces of righteousness. When he does decide to change someone, his usual goal is to eventually twist them into a complete monster, though occasionally he seems to want to first drive them insane. He is good at calling to the darker impulses in people, as Angel is good as calling to the nobler ones. Spike commented that Drusilla might have made him a vampire, but Angelus was the one who made him a monster.

    Angel's primary motivation is atonement. He wants forgiveness for everything that he did as Angelus, despite being sure that he does not deserve it and will probably never earn it. Take this, fuel it with even more guilt, and we have why he seems to have this pathological need to be a martyr. He does not believe that he deserves to be happy, and will generally sabotage said happiness for the good of someone else whenever he sees the chance to be content. This naturally has some things to do with the curse, as if he gets that one moment of true happiness all of his friends and loved ones are royally screwed, again, but that's not all of it. Even without the curse, when it can't touch him, Angel can't seem to allow himself to be happy. Other people come first, he comes last. He has a white knight complex the size of Europe, and he will save people, be the expense his public humiliation or his chance at happiness. Sometimes, in fact, the mile-wide protective streak can work against him. By leaping to the defense of whoever immediately, he has at times made the situation worse.

    Around equal with his saving-people complex is Buffy. She is and will always be one of the most important things in his life. However, for that reason exactly, he constantly tries to push her away. He wants her to be happy and doesn't want her at risk. He remembers what he did to her, when he became Angelus. A chance of that happening again is too much -- besides, she deserves better. As Angelus, Buffy is "still all he thinks about". Naturally, the effects are somewhat different. He wants to ruin her, as that is how he shows his attention and therefore in some twisted way how he shows love. Despite this, he never seems able to bring himself to kill her. He had several opportunities but always claimed that the moment isn't right. I think that he also can't imagine quite how life would proceed without her to torture; it would lose a great deal of its flavor.

    He really dislikes some of your typical vampire stereotypes, like sleeping in coffins. Presumably he got tired of hearing people ask him where his coffin was, year after year after year, especially as Angel. Angelus seems the type that wouldn't mind the legends half as much, as he could use them to his advantage. Angel, who isn't a monster, would likely be as tired of everyone assuming instantly that he's evil as anything else, and the snap decision that he's bad and the associated difficulty of winning trust in those circumstances would likely be annoying. Angelus doesn't generally need to worry about getting people to trust him -- most will be dead soon enough, and those that aren't usually wish they were. Either that or he's got plans.

    He is extremely intelligent, in almost every sense of the word. He's usually fairly street smart, can judge people quickly and for the most part accurately, has had literally centuries to bone up on his reading and general purpose knowledge, is an adept and very convincing liar, can be an easy and charismatic leader or the lead-by-example type it seems instinctively, and is good at setting up complex plans of his own, or detecting and foiling the complex plans of others. This being said, he's only one man vampire, and for such a smart guy, he can be really dumb sometimes. He can't do everything, he can't be everywhere, and he can be taken by surprise, caught in traps, and otherwise played. An easy way to make Angel stop thinking is to play on that need-to-be-a-hero complex that he's got. He's leapt before he looked in the past, when he felt that he had to do so in order to save someone. Another easy way to make Angel sabotage himself is to play on that martyr complex of his. If he is painted as a danger, Angel is entirely willing to believe that his sacrifice is both acceptable and necessary for the greater good. As to Angelus, perhaps the easiest way to get the better of him would be to play on his pride. He likes being in control at all times, when that control is taken from him or otherwise withheld, he can get a bit crazy and stop thinking quite so well.

    Angel can be very arrogant, and seems to have an unconscious but still very present sense of inherent superiority. Quite often, he seems as though he separates himself and holds himself about his company. In one sense, it's just another excuse to push people away from him. In another, he's been fairly spoiled for a good deal of his life and unlife. Though his family was never the wealthiest, they did have enough money to keep a nice house with nice clothes and silver table settings and a maid -- considering the class that he appeared to have commonly hung out with while alive, that would likely put him towards the top of the ladder. After being vamped, well. Darla was a favorite of the Master, which probably lent him some status by itself, he was an incredibly vicious vampire which would have gotten him more. Also, from the flashbacks, it's fairly clear that he posed as a gentleman most of the time. That means, among other things, money. Things went downhill when he got a soul, and he hit his all time low in the 1970s, but even then he held himself apart. In a way it was probably still pride. Once he did get back into the swing of things and started taking care of himself, it becomes clear that he's somewhat vain. No matter how many times he may deny it, it is nonetheless clear that he takes care of his appearance, despite how difficult that would doubtless be with no mirror. He wears nice clothing and some jewelry, and despite repeated assertions that he does not use hair gel and does not style his hair to look that way (he acts surprised and uncomfortable when he sees it) I personally find that very difficult to believe. For one, by now he really should have seen photos of himself at one point or another. For another, he obviously has some control over it, and does style it to look that way -- in one episode he has it temporarily slicked down. People who would know have also said he uses hair gel and besides, he never has bed-head. He is arrogant, but goes to lengths to try and pretend that he isn't. Perhaps even more than that, he is building himself a persona, with his dress and his mannerisms and everything else. And then there's the fact that he has a soul. He is not just another demon, he is different. He is damned, but a special case all the same.

    Angelus isn't half so subtle. He is arrogant, and expects everyone around him to acknowledge one way or another that he is better than they are. He can affect them in a way that no one else can, he is stronger, he is faster, he is the leader or a better leader or a better lover or whatever. He loves making people squirm by showing off the better-than-themness and watching them be unable to do anything about it. In fact, modern Angelus appears to either be far more arrogant than he used to be or else vaguely suicidal. In the old days, he tended to play relatively safe. He'd go after dangerous targets, sure, but these days he's moved on to doing things like Slayer-baiting, when he used to be very sure to avoid the Slayer. Back a hundred years ago, in the glory days of the Whirlwind, Angelus specifically told Spike to steer clear of the Slayer. It seems likely that he was stretching his legs, so to speak, after years of imprisonment, and reverting to type -- a very young Angelus could be extremely reckless in the no-idea-who-not-to-bait sort of way.

    Both Angelus and Angel are driven by the memory of his father's contempt, disapproval, and the expectation that he would be nothing more than a lazy, womanizing drunk and no man. A part of what drives their arrogance is probably a desire to prove that he was wrong. Beyond this, the paths diverge. Angelus was driven by the memory of his father to become one of the most hideously and flamboyantly sadistic vampires ever recorded, to prove that he can do something great. Angel mostly doesn't try to prove his dad wrong. Somewhere near his core, he's privately convinced that he is a failure -- useless and a waste of space. He's got his soul, good for him, he was never much of a man, and now he's a monster.

    Angel was pretty apathetic about his life and death in general, until he heard the prophecy. He mostly seemed to figure that he'd live until someone killed him, good for him. Probably the only reason that he never bothered staking himself, back in the 70s for example, was that just living was the worst punishment he could think of for himself. After hearing the prophecy he's gotten some reason to care a bit more.

    Of the seven deadly sins, he's most susceptible to wrath, pride, and lust. Unlike in his human days, when he was mostly a layabout, these days he is like, anti-sloth. He is constantly the man with the plan. He doesn't really want much, or not much that he can have anyway. Angel does envy humans their ability to do things like just live -- go out in the day, be with the people they love, etc. He can be petty and jealous and just as insecure as any other person, though it's a bit harder to instill such emotions in him. Angel really cares about very little, so he isn't threatened by much. Angelus is generally pretty content with where he is. Mostly he wants more fear, more people to terrorize, more influence.

    Angel is also shy about his eating habits. He likes to be as "normal" as it is possible for him to be, and kicking back with a packet of blood in the company of friends isn't really the definition of normal. In addition, he's been a loner for almost a century, and old habits are hard to break.

    Speaking of old habits, Angel can brood. Oh how he broods. It is one of those things that he's the best at, hanging around and brooding, guilting over past sins and brooding some more in his basement all alone. In his own words, over the century of having a soul he's really managed to hone his brooding skills. In the words of another, [vampires are regret personified, "hunger for life that's been damned to never be satisfied".] Angel is arguably a better example of this than any other vampire. Regret is half of what he does.

    Angel seems to have this rule with close interpersonal relationships, wherein he doesn't do them. It possibly ties into that not-allowing-himself-to-be-happy thing, as well as some bad experiences prior to 1996 wherein people he thought he could be friends with tried to kill him/betrayed him. He's gotten very good at shutting people out, so taking a step back and allowing them in is very much a change, still something he's pretty bad at, and not something he does much. He likes his associates at arm's length. So, understandably, when he does get close to anyone, it makes quite an impression in him. In a similar vein, though he doesn't hold many grudges, if you seriously get on his bad side then you are firmly there, and it's extremely difficult to make him like you. Ever. And, when he really dislikes someone and is pushed too far-

    Man, are you in trouble.

    When pushed hard enough, Angel becomes an obsessed, driven psychopath who is in some ways scarier than even Angelus could manage -- Angelus has a snide, brash, sinisterly playful edge to his actions, which Angel mirrors when he's not too busy brooding. When Angel is driven too far, that disappears. He becomes a cold, grim avenger, on the edge of madness, fighting (it appears) both sanity and insanity at the same time, repressing every emotion until he is a cold and driven by-any-means-necessary, mission-oriented mercenary. Presumably you could drive Angelus to a similar place, but it would be both extremely difficult and you'd probably end up very dead first, provided you could manage it.

    He is independent and controlling, and so very much a leader that he can't be a follower, even when he tries to be. He's bad at it. It doesn't work. He's in general very casual about violence, unless it's someone he cares about that's getting hurt. If that's the case, about 90% of the time he will find a way to blame himself for it, and then goes out to kill something. This could be in part a reflection of a time gone past. Angel is very, very old, and while he doesn't generally act anything like his age, occasionally something will slip through.




    catholic


    as spike puts it, "always was a bit of a drama queen"


    "I never hated my victims; I never killed in anger. It was always about the pain and the pleasure"


    buffybuffybuffy

    scoobies in general, xander and willow opposite ends, giles somewhere in the middle
    cordy
    dru
    darla
    spike
    fledglings in general
    joyce


    Angel rarely loves or hates anything purely - it is a mixture, most exemplified in himself


    Mostly I was thinking I'd go chronological order here, but it's impossible not to start with Buffy.

    Buffy is the love of his life, the center of his universe, his soulmate, his raison d'être, you name it. "In all those years, no one ever mattered. Not like she did." "In 243 years, I have loved exactly one person."


    She has changed him, probably more than either of them realize. Before he met her, Angel was a coward. He was good at running away from things, he'd developed a great talent for doing so. He preferred turning and running away to nasty, upsetting things like confrontation, and saving the world was so far down his priority list as to be nonexistent. He wanted to stay alive but didn't much care about anything or anyone but himself; he'd prefer to keep the world from burning, but wouldn't do much beyond give advice when people were dying - and sometimes that advice was 'run away and hide'. If Angel is a champion, Buffy is the reason for it. He wasn't a quarter as self-sacrificing as he turned out before a girl showed up and proved that Beauty did love the Beast, and that perhaps because of that the Beast had a shot at redemption.


    She makes him want to be more. She always makes him want to be more -- she always has and she always will. She is what makes him strive to be better.


    He is in love with her. He will always be in love with her. But, despite that, he is so used to loss and pain, to not having what he wants or to losing it, that he can deal with her not being there, or dying, and continue. He hates himself for it, but he can do it.






    And now, Darla. Darla is the dark counterpart to what Buffy is. She is his sire, and though he never loved her, he was obsessed with her.




    [point in timeline you're picking your character from]: post s1 of AtS
    [journal post]:
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